Why This List?
Wanessa loves watching kung fu movies from the 90’s and all the cliches that come with it. As we’ve covered all the famous Jet Li and Jackie Chan films, we started to see some hilarious patterns. When we watch these movies on some chill nights at home, we’d check through all this list and have a good laugh when we cover from 25 to sometimes all 30 of these characteristics in these classic movies.
How to Write This List
Four easy steps:
Step One. Grab a pen, paper, and loved one.
Step Two. Put on some old school (70-90s) kung fu movies on your platform of choice
Step Three. Write down and laugh at all cliches you’re bound to find.
Step Four. Repeat!
The best way to come up with this list is by living it and sharing it.
- Some type of long scroll decreed by an emperor
- Old government official or monk that loves to laugh loudly at nothing
- Young monks practicing kung fu exercises in unison
- A fight involving food of some sort
- A corrupt government official
- A kung fu competition of some sort
- A protagonist fighter demonstrating a special style of kung fu that no one else can beat
- Badass female fighter
- Someone mildly important dies and gives the protagonist strength
- A workout or training montage
- The protagonist faces a ransom of person or holy object
- The protagonist always starts by losing his final fight
- Miraculously the protagonist digs deep and finds extra strength to win the epic battle showdown after thinking of a new strategy
- There’s a quick zoom pan and evil music soundtrack for the bad guy
- Using a random prop (furniture) as a weapon
- Initial resistance of the protagonist for fighting
- Protagonist stumble upon a random stranger and comes to the aid in a heroic gesture
- Fu man chu mustache and ridiculously long eyebrows
- Someone scrambling on a roof
- Steamed buns (for eating and sometimes throwing at enemies)
- Dramatic head toss of braid/hair over the shoulder in a method to make any Pantene model green with envy
- Praying to a Buddha
- Incompetent government henchmen
- Plot twist of more evil people
- Semi-comedic death of a henchman or mid level boss
- Reference to a philosophical Buddhist hymn
- Elderly mentor counseling the young protagonist
- Large urns of Chinese liquor or soup
- Clothing gets ripped off to show the surprisingly muscular fighter
- Terrible English translations
~See Lemons Love Kung Fu